Impact of SLowdown on IT Employee's Family

Vijay (Calling his family from Amsterdam):

Good Evening Mom and Dad.  Where is my wife Sravya?

 

Dad: Just now I called her. She is on the way to home after taking our

grandson Rahul from his school.

 

Vijay: Let us wait for her few minutes and we will start this discussion.

 

(By the time Sravya entered in to the house.. Vijay continue the meeting)

 

I hope you know the Agenda of the meeting which I had mentioned in the

meeting request. Even though let me read out the agenda once again

 

1. Status update/Discussion on Last Week Action Items

 

2. Family Strategy

 

2. Rahul's Education

 

3. Medical Insurance for Mom and Dad

 

I hope every one have the printout of last week MOM (Minutes of Meeting).

Dear Mom can you please update the status of tasks which you are taking

care of?

 

Mom: Vijay, I am taking care of kitchen module which involves making

products like Sambar, Rasam, Curd Rice, Vegetable Biriyani.I am not

comfortable in handling the tools for making Non Vegetarian products. You

suggest some training in Hlite. However after making these products, I am

giving to your Dad for Acceptance testing. Once he satisfied with the

quality of taste, we pass it to Dining Hall. One more thing, I would like

to share with you. As you have suggested during my appraisal discussion,

now I have stopped crying while watching mega serials in TV

 

Vijay: Sounds Good.

 

Vijay: Now coming to Dad. Dad can you please update us?

 

Dad: Yes. My dear son. I have completed my tasks by paying the current

bill and phone bill with in time.

 

Vijay: That's good

 

Dad: But I couldn't pay the premium amount of 9200.00 of the LIC plan

which you had taken for tax reduction purpose.

 

Vijay: It doesn't look nice dad. I have sent you the amount already and

given clear instructions.

Can you explain to me what went wrong?

 

Dad: On Tuesday night suddenly one of our team mate (your mom) fell

Down on the floor when she was running to catch Rahul. Then we took her

to hospital and spent that amount for her medical expenses.

 

Mom: Vijay, I would like to add on what your Dad said, that was true. I

got heavy injury in my legs and I was in hospital for two days. So now we

don't have money to pay for the premium.

 

Vijay: Sravya..! Would you aware of this? As a home lead, I expect you to

track these issues and send it to me on daily basis. What are you doing

(With stress on 'doing') after coming from college?

 

Sravya: Will do it Vijay. You know that the college, I am working is very

far from our home. Every day I come back home at 6 pm and sit with Rahul

for assisting him for doing his home work.

 

Vijay: Ok. Coming to second Agenda point .Due to this financial crisis we

need to change the strategy of running our family. I am looking for your

cooperation in the following cost cutting activities. I want to see the

cost benefit of 40 % in this month budget after implementing this

 

 

ü Asking servant maid to leave her job

 

ü Stop ordering Pizzas for dinner

 

ü Avoid Tooth paste and use Neem sticks/Banyan Tree Sticks

 

ü Wise to listen news from our near by portion when they watch news in TV

 

ü Every Saturday visit our relative's homes and spend the whole day

including break fast, lunch and Dinner

 

ü Don't invite anybody to our home. Sunday our relatives might come to

our house. Just lock the door outside and do your work inside silently.

 

ü Everybody assemble in adjacent street Saibaba temple on Sunday for

breakfast. They provide 'Pulihora' as 'prasadam' which is good in taste

 

ü Sravya ..  stop going for gym and Yoga class. Use Hand Grinder

(Replacement  of Mixie) instead of grinder and Mixie. Mom please give KT to

Sravya about this.

 

ü Don't buy excess of things and store it in Fridge. Use big Mud pots for

cool water.

 

ü Everybody go to bed early around 6:30 pm. Ask Rahul to do his homework

when he comes back from school immediately during the hours sunlight is

available. If not ask him to read under street light. He will become like

Lincoln (Former US President) one day.

 

ü Use as much of cycle for transportation to near by places(It will help you

to reduce fat and Cholesterol content)

 

ü I know you are eager to watch latest release 'Kotha Bangaru Lokam'. Don't

plan for that. Wail till next year Diwali to watch the same movie in MAA TV

 

If you have any clarifications contact Sravya@kitchen.com

 

Coming to second Agenda point. Sravya, can you please update me about

Rahul's Education. In which standard he is studying? Whether he got any

double promotion? He was writing annual exam for third standard when I

was leaving for Amsterdam.

 

Sravya: Vijay, I am bit worrying about his education. I have tracked his

efforts, schedule in our OHM+ tool. I found 20 % in Effort variance and 35

% in schedule deviation. His learning curve goes down in the control chart

which you can see in the report, I have sent you yesterday.

 

Vijay: Thanks for your measurements. I will review the report and we will

discuss it on next week's call. I have a client meeting now. So we will

discuss the third agenda item next week. Mom and Dad.. can you please

drop out from the call ?. I wanted to talk to Sravya about few personal

things and Dad, don't forget to circulate the MOM to every one.

 

Sravya: Hello Vijay..

 

Sravya: Hello.Hello.

 

Sravya: Hello.

 

<Tring.Tring..Tring.Line Got Disconnected>

 

Golden Telephone

A Writer decided to write a book about famous churches around the World.

 So he bought a plane ticket and took a trip to China.

On his first day he was inside a church taking photographs when he noticed a golden telephone mounted on the wall with a sign that read "$10,000 per call".

The Writer, being intrigued, asked a priest who was strolling by what The telephone was used for.

The priest replied that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 you could talk to God.

The Writer thanked the priest and went along his way.

Next stop was in Japan. There, at a very large cathedral, he saw the Same golden telephone with the same sign under it.

He wondered if this was the same kind of telephone he saw in China and He asked a nearby nun what its purpose was.

She told him that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 He Could talk to God.

"O.K., thank you," said the Writer.

He then traveled to Pakistan , Srilanka , Russia , Germany and France .

In every church he saw the same golden telephone with the same "$10,000 Per call" sign under it.

 

The Writer, upon leaving Vermont decided to travel to up to India to See if Indians had the same phone.

  He arrived in India , and again, in the first church he entered, there Was the same golden telephone, but this time the sign under it read "One Rupee per call."

 The Writer was surprised so he asked the priest about the sign. "Father, I've traveled all over World and I've seen this same golden Telephone in many churches. I'm told that it is a direct line to Heaven, But in the US the price was $10,000 per call.

The priest smiled and answered, "You're in India now, Son - it's a Local Call".

 

This is the only heaven on the Earth.

 

Microsoft Bugs .. Try It

MAGIC #1
An Indian found that nobody can create a FOLDER anywhere on the Computer which can be named as "CON". This is something funny and inexplicable… AtMicrosoft the whole Team, couldn't answer why this happened !!
TRY IT NOW, IT WILL NOT CREATE A "CON" FOLDER

MAGIC #2
For those of you using Windows, do the following:
1.) Open an empty notepad file
2.) Type "Bush hid the facts" (without the quotes)
3.) Save it as whatever you want.
4.) Close it, and re-open it.
Noticed the weird bug? No one can explain!

MAGIC #3
Again this is something funny and can't be explained… At Microsoft thewhole Team, including Bill Gates, couldn't answer why this happened!
It was discovered by a Brazilian. Try it out yourself…
Open Microsoft Word and type
=rand (200, 99)
And then press ENTER And see the magic…..!